Mile Markers of Life

This is a silly question, but I have no experience, so I need to know.

For IM Boulder, and I assume a lot of other half iron races, there are 3 aid stations along the course. I always usually utilize aid stations for every race I’ve ever done. I’ve seen a lot of people just call out what they want and whiz by on their bike as they grab it, but do other people, (not the speedsters or pros) actually stop and grab what they want and then resume their ride? I feel like a dumb dumb for not knowing what to do…I feel like if I wanted/needed a powerbar or something AND a drink on the bike I couldn’t physically do that without eating pavement…so do I stop? Pull just ahead of the aid station and quickly eat/drink what I want and leave the trash there? Because I know they have semi strict rules about littering. It’s easier on the run because you’re not moving as fast, but on the bike, there’s a huge radius where you could fling your excess.

Anyway…experienced tri peeps let me know please?

Well…an old friend convinced me into doing this fun 5k in Denver this weekend! Apparently we do a lap in the Mile High Stadium, which is cool for all the football lovers. It looks to be like a super girly race…I don’t have a running skirt but I guess I’ll just have to deck out in pink!! :)

It should be a lot of fun. There’s food and drinks afterward and some kind of block party. I’m not sure. Sometimes spur of the moment racing is the best kind!! It was only 30 bucks..why not? Plus girl time with a friend I rarely see. It’s a win win and worth it!!

The first thing I checked was what I got. I know, I know…some of you roll your eyes or whatever you do…but anyone who says they don’t race, even just a little bit, for the bling are either liars or just no fun at all. I love the goodies and bling I get at races. No medal, but I guess I get some kind of glass.

I’m excited ;)

I had the most awful dream I think I could possibly have. It was the night before my huge Tri..the 70.3 and I had everything somewhat layed out. It was in the hallway and waiting for me. I have no freakin idea why, but I set my stupid alarm for 8:05 and went to sleep.

I slept hard and dreamed in my dream. I started with the swim and did really well..I finished around 45 minutes, which would be awesome for me. In my dream, I then transitioned to the RUN!!! I did my effing Tri out of order. I also did really well on the run, so well that I thought the clock was wrong. It was a horrid course. It was out and back 13 times on a rolling hill. Idiotic. Why does my brain come up with these things.

Okay so at this point I am awakened by my alarm…and I completely nonchalantly get out of bed as if I have no where to be. I then realize…holy crap my Tri. So I lose it. I fly to the hall and try to collect my things. I get two bags. One for essentials and one for crap I just need to bring. It’s 7:09 now. 9 minutes past the start and I am still in my home packing my bags.

I start crying. I’ve forgotten how to think and I scream about how I don’t know what to pack. I’ve forgotten what I need and have left a lot of things out. I search for a tight sports bra in the dirty. basket. I search for my bike shorts on the floor. I search for my race belt and nuun and sunscreen. By this time it’s 8:23.

I cry harder. There is no point in going anymore. I wondered if they would let me still start but decide they wouldn’t. Tardiness doesn’t pay off in this event. It’s all my fault. It’s all my friends fault. Where is she? Why didn’t she remind me that we were driving up the day before? That bitch.

And with that I writhe awake. I still think it’s real and then slowly, thankfully realize it’s not. It’s just a dream. It’s just a terrible no good very bad dream. I still have a chance. I’m okay. Let it be known that I will now begin laying my crap out a week in advance. Triple check my bags, GO UP the day before(duhhh) and set my alarm and wake up for the race I spent a crap ton of money, time, sweart, heart, and soul on collectively. I’ll be there.

Holy race anxiety!!! Why you torture me?!

I wasn’t going to run today. I’m still knee deep in my room purging project, but suddenly the skies grew dark and I heard the sound of falling rain outside my window. The smell wafted into my room and at that moment I was a goner.

We don’t get rain very much in Colorado. During summer it sprinkles or rains heavily during the evenings almost every day, but it’s almost always short lived. I’m spontaneous and in love with the rain: every time it rains I have to go outside for a walk. Just to be. There is something so calming and cleansing about walking slowly in the rain while it comes down all around you. It’s heaven to me.

So with a storm that lasted more than 5 minutes I decided to take advantage. My messes will be here when I return. I threw on running clothes and old shoes and took off. Best thing ever. I adore running in the rain. I splashed and jumped in puddles. I smiled big and ran my heart out, overjoyed to be doing it in the rain.

Good stuff.

Feel good. I didn’t really want to run, but once I got going I was really in the zone. As in dancing to my music and such things that are probably obnoxious to the people around me. :) but you know what annoys me a lot? Prissy girls who walk at a 2 on the treadmill with their hair down and full makeup and shorts that allow their ass to hang out for the world to see.

Baby: don’t ask for a booty call at the gym or I might have to smack you one someday.

This was the song running through my head for the entire swim…how perfect. Now is the time where panic starts to ensue. I swam today. The best part about it was after I finished and got to take a cat nap in the sun. It sucked so much…and crap days like this make mereallynervous. I felt like a flailing, splashing idiot the whole time. I couldn’t get my rhythm. I couldn’t get into it…the entire mile just felt unorganized, off rhythm flailing.

 I am starting to get scared about race day…I check nearly everday for the swim waves, and I have checked probably 6 or 7 times, double and triple checking the cutoff times. It’s 1:10 after the final wave. That sounds doable right? It would be superb if I knew what my wave was. Even so, I’m sure I will befine, but the fact that there are cutoff times makes me cringe. It brings up thoughts of me not being good enough, fast enough, determined enough to finish. My greatest fear about the entire race isnotmaking it through the swim. Hundreds of different thoughts run through my head. What if I am too slow? What if I get off course and lose valuable time? What if I make it to the final stretch and realize I’ve only got a few minutes left and just give up? These thoughts creep in everytime I go to swim, to stroke, to breathe…they invade every crack and crevice of my brain.

I am a slow swimmer. Even on good days where I feel like I have it I’m really a slow poke. I am entirely terrified of having a DNF on my race results page because I couldn’t make it through the swim. All those days and workouts I skipped in winter because I was too lazy, too tired, too this, too that, now I get to kill myself and make these last two months count because I’m terrified.

There are dates that are signifigant…days in the future that are huge and big and solid days where big accomplishments will be made. These days, we look forward to them for months, weeks…we train hard for them, we think about these days over and over, everyday, hundreds of times. Today is June 5th…

33 Days: SheRox Triathlon- Sprint—My first tri ever!

46 Days: Epic Rocky Mountain Relay with 12 of my closest running buds

61 Days, 2 months: THE big day. The Boulder half ironman.

I can’t collect my thoughts enough at the moment to write something inspirational or poetic or humorous. All I can do is focus on exactly what I’m feeling right at this very moment and think about what it means to me, for me. To think about what these last few days slipping away means, what I have left to give, and how I’m going to get there. It’s been a long time coming…I signed up for this in November.

A thought turned into an action, and here I am…2 months out from the biggest race of my life…the biggest event of my life. I’m sort of nervous. But really excited.

Sort of being the understatement of the century.