I’m feeling pretty good about myself today. Other than the random social drinks and a few cravings I decided to fulfill, I’ve been completely consistent for 5 whole weeks. This has never ever ever happened. Ever. I’ve only missed one workout, something I’m more proud of that anything. Two months ago it was a complete battle to even get to the gym twice a week, and let’s be honest thos workouts were wussy fests. I am really proud of myself for this. Truly this time I believe I to be a lifestyle change.
I was stuck in the depths. I had a chain of laziness, self loathing, and self sabotage welded to my ankles. Metaphorically, I had the gun, the saw, the keys, and whatever other tool to unlock this thing that had been holding me back for over a year. I’m not sure what it was, but something just clicked in my head. I realized I couldn’t keep going the way I was going. I would get sick. Mentally and emotionally I already was. Poor body image can be a disease if you let it get away. I was already emotionally and mentally sick, I wasn’t ready to be physically sick. Being a future nurse and knowing what sick is, what comes if you don’t take care of yourself, that terrifies me. So I changed.
This is the only fucking body you have. If you’re stuck in the depths, figure out what it takes to get loose and begin your ascent to better places…. It’s really freaking worth it.